Adult Home Party Tips
Business Building Tips: Selling 101
Lube 101: How to keep from letting your resources dry up
Marketing Tips: By Ted Drabkowski
Top Five Tips: Lubricants
Selling 101
You've got a roomful of party guests and a hostess excited to get free products. You've set up your display, handed out catalogs, and played a quick game or two. Now comes the most important part of your job - selling. If you don't sell, you've wasted your hostess coaching, your time investment, and the time of your guests. Sure, home party consultants are educators and advocates for sex, but that's a means to an end - selling. So here are some dos and don'ts on selling to your heart's content.
1. Don't make vague promises. Explaining how a product works is sufficient - no need to make it sound like the ultimate in pleasure without specific details. Vague statements like "This will rock your world! Everyone should have one!" is not effective by itself.
2. Don't use a hard-sell approach. Pushing people to buy a lot of stuff is off-putting. Especially with the intimate nature of our products, simply offering the options and pointing out differences between them is enough. In the end, people will choose what's right for them, hopefully making them happier with their order (and you as a consultant). Not everyone wants (or is ready for) a Jackrabbit, so don't push it on every single person. Be sure to listen to the customer. They will guide you to what they are curious about. I find most successful consultants are good listeners.
3. Promote the benefits, not just the features. Also known as "don't sell the steak, sell the sizzle!" A multi-action vibe has gyration, spinning beads, and intense vibration. But what does that mean to the customer? It means triple stimulation - G-spot, clitoris, labia, which no other kind of vibe can offer. When you explain this triple stimulation, you'll see the lights go on with your customers - "Ohhh! That's why they're so popular!" Be sure to explain what the features translate to in terms of benefits! Look at each product and think: Why would a customer want this? What will it do for her or him? If you can answer that question in your sales presentation, you'll find the customers really excited to order from you.
4. Use the catalog as a sales tool, not just as backup for your presentation. You don't have to have every single item in the catalog on your presentation table. You might find it extremely effective to have a nice selection from each category, and then refer to the catalog for other items. Company's worked hard to make the catalog be helpful, educational, and have selling points right in it.
5. Personal testimonials can boost your sales. If anyone at the party has tried a particular product (Coochy Creme, Pure Instinct, and Nympho's Desire tend to collect these testimonials!), see if they'll be willing to stand up and say how great it is! Or just ask, "Has anyone tried this? Wanna tell us how it works?" If just one customer stands up and says, for example, "The Coochy Creme really does work, and I just love it! I'm definitely going to buy a bottle or two tonight!" then you are very likely to sell a bottle to nearly everyone in the room. If no one there has tried the product, you can always use stories you picked up at other parties.
6. Cash and carry. When someone sees what they want, right there in hand, ready for the taking, they are far more likely to pony up the money and buy it. Try to carry stock of our most popular smaller items - silver bullets, all kinds of lotions and lubes, masturbators, and even some of the smaller vibes and sample kits. Often, people will buy more if they can take at least part of their order home that night. You can slowly build a box of stock merchandise of your best sellers.
7. Make it easy to buy. The more barriers you unknowingly put up for making a purchase, the harder it is to convince someone to buy from you. So make it as easy as possible. One of the best ways to increase sales is to accept credit cards and checks. Be sure your Hostess lets her friends know that they can use all major credit cards as well as personal checks! Something most of the competition can't offer. Also, help your customers fill out the order form. Tell them "Put your name and mailing address at the top, and I'll help with the rest" so that they don't have to fuss with finding product numbers etc. This also speeds up the order taking process which is one of the most important parts of the party.
8. Business cards. Very important. With every conversation, contact, order, booking, names list etc... GIVE OUT YOUR CARDS! Now your prospect will have your e-mail, web address and phone # to contact you. Can't say enough about business cards - they are always with me. A favorite pastime of mine is to hand out a card to someone different every day. One per day no matter what. Some will hand out more per day but if you just did one a day how many would that be in a year? Get the picture? Takes me 5 minutes to "plant a seed" with some one each day and the pay off is enormous! You would be surprised at how many parties you will book and prospects you will recruit with this approach.
9. Read, read, read! Education can only help your business. The more you know about human sexuality, the more you can help your customers! I recommend "TOYGASMS" by Dr. Sadie Allison. I have had the pleasure to talk with Sadie at length about her book. Everything you need to know is in there. Use it as a reference manual and know it inside out. Your sales will soar I promise you.
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Lube 101: How to keep from letting your resources dry up.
by Jenn Ramsey
Why Lube?
Moisture is essential to any kind of sexual activity-rubbing dry skin against even drier skin quickly shows how uncomfortable sex can be without lubrication. Moisture prevents micro-abrasions that can happen from sexual friction in our most sensitive areas, as well as heightens sensation. Jenne from Clitical.com illustrated it well when she described her "finger on lip" test: First run a finger over a dry lip, then lick the lip and try again. You'll understand why moisture is so important. Many sexually active women incorrectly think that one's own vaginal moisture or saliva is enough. However, lube is more than just moisture; it's formulated to be slicker than the body's natural juices and designed to give a bit of padding between surfaces in motion. There are endless reasons for loss of vaginal moisture-most relating to changes in our estrogen levels, which directly affect how moist we are:
- Individual Differences: Some women just produce more moisture than others.
- Age: As women mature, our bodies produce less estrogen, affecting moisture levels.
- Diabetes: Diabetic angioplathy can decrease moisture levels.
- Menstrual Cycle: Some women are drier depending upon the frequency and duration of their monthly cycles. Our periods change our estrogen levels, thus affecting how moist we are.
- Stress: Even the slightest tension affects sexual response in both men and women.
- Drugs: Recreational, over-the-counter, and prescription medications also can decrease lubrication. Even such common medications as birth control pills, cigarettes, and alcohol can reduce natural moisture levels.
- Weather: Women who live in more arid regions and don't keep their bodies hydrated can experience additional dryness in their nether regions, as well.
- Pregnancy/Childbirth: The hormonal fluctuations involved in having children can create dryness issues.
- Medical Problems: Pelvic surgery, diabetes, and nearly any physiological complication can interfere with the body's natural ability to lubricate.
While this list may not seem too big, these aren't all the factors. Travel, frequency of sex, even how much coffee you drink can contribute to complete loss of or reduced self-lubrication. Combine the added benefits of using lube - instead of relying on vaginal fluid or saliva - with the myriad reasons for the body's depletion of natural juices, and you should be reaching for the lube without a second thought.
Repeated sexual activity without using lube can provide a tough lesson on the benefits of over-the-counter lubricants. Anal sex especially can result in painful (if not simply inconvenient) injuries to the anal cavity, because that area produces absolutely no moisture on its own. Tearing is a frequent injury associated with lack of moisture-as is injury of the (inner) involuntary sphincter muscle, which notifies the body when a bowel movement is pending.
Now that we've established that lube is a good and necessary thing, the next question is: Which one to get?
CATEGORIES OF LUBE:
The amount of information about lube in general is vast and confusing, so I'll highlight just the essentials. There are basically three different kids of lube. Below are descriptions of each, with some general tips for quick reference.
Oil-based:
Oil-based lubes were the first recorded lubricants. Egyptians started using olive oil back in the hieroglyphics days. Without better options available, we've been reaching for anything slippery, such as cooking oil and the makeup remover Aboline; all oil-based. Sadly these will cause yeast infections in women and break down latex condoms and toys.
It's only in recently that we've discovered that oil wreaks havoc on the vagina, harboring bacteria and creating yeast infections. Some sex educators therefore reserve oil-based lubes for anal sex and male masturbation. Recent research is also ruling out use for anal sex, as some experts say it can coat the lining of the rectum, providing a haven for many potential infections. Whether or not that's true, the trouble and expense of any type of infection simply isn't worth the risk.
Male masturbation seems to be more suitable for oil-based lubes. The lubes are super slippery and thick without being sticky. There are mineral oil-based lubes, which are liquid at room temperature, hypoallergenic, and clean up easily with soap and water.
Male masturbation seems to be more suitable for oil-based lubes. The lubes are super slippery and thick without being sticky. There are mineral oil-based lubes, which are liquid at room temperature, hypoallergenic, and clean up easily with soap and water.
Petroleum also fits into this category. White or food-grade petroleum is what products sold as sexual lubricants use; yellow has more impurities and is not good for the body. Petroleum is solid at room temperature, hypoallergenic, more slippery than mineral oil, and doesn't clean up very easily-although you can wipe off as much as possible and call the rest "moisturizer."
Common ingredients: Mineral oil, petroleum.
Water-based:
Lube as we know it descended from a cellulose/water combination called Surgilube, released in the 1950s and still commonly used today for "medical applications." Translation: one-time insertion. Astroglide was one of the first lubes designed strictly for sexual play. What about KY-Jelly, you may ask? It was designed to aid with medical examinations, and it tends to gum up quickly when used for sex play; although since its creation, KY specifically has designed lubes for sexual activity.
The majority of lubes are water based. They are great, all-purpose lubes because they are condom safe, generally don't stain (depending upon if coloring has been added), and can be flavored easily. Because they are water based, they dehydrate (dry up), but the slippery ingredients still remain; a quick re-wetting of the lubed area and you're back in business.
Water-based lubes are thicker than silicone lube because water molecules are thicker than silicone molecules, so water-based moisturizers often are recommended for anal sex (although some people prefer silicone lube because it doesn't dry up as quickly). Water-based lubes clean up easily with soap and water, although some of the better water-based lubes will be absorbed into your skin and moisturize, as well.
The only across-the-board disadvantage to water-based lube is that it dehydrates quicker than other types of lubes. Most water-based lubes contain glycerin, which can break down into sugar when inside the vagina, causing yeast infections for women who are prone to them. Unlike silicone lube, which is made out of inert ingredients, water-based lubes can contain ingredients that may react with the body, depending upon the body's sensitivity to glycerin-based lubes and lubes that contain parabens.
Common ingredients: Glycerin or plant cellulose; Methyl, butyl, ethyl and propyl parabens (preservatives, bonding agents and antiseptics); propylene glycol (thickening agent and preservative).
Silicone-based:
Silicone is clear, thinner, and feels slick. If you just touch the cap of the lube bottle, you'll feel how slippery it is without having to put it on your skin. Although it tends to be more expensive, a little bit goes a long way, so a bottle of silicone lube will last twice as long as a similarly sized bottle of water-based lube.
Silicone molecules are smaller than water molecules; therefore, there's less padding. Personal tastes dictate whether this is a good or bad thing. Because silicone isn't a naturally occurring substance, it doesn't absorb like water-based lube. When you factor in that the body expels foreign substances, silicone lube is actually out of the body's system faster than you might think. Silicone is inert, which means it won't change the pH balance or react with the body's chemistry-a big plus if one is prone to yeast infections.
Because it's not water soluble, it's also the perfect choice for using in water. But, be careful: It will make the floor of your shower slippery, too.
Silicone lube also is great for massages because it doesn't dry up quickly (try using it as a shaving cream or for making your latex clothes shine). Soap and water will wash it off with a little effort.
The only disadvantages related to silicone-based lubes are its potential to stain or ruin other silicone-based toys. If you spill it on your sheets, it will leave an oily ring that will take plenty of time to wash out. Also, the only thing that bonds to silicone is silicone; so using silicone lube with lower-quality silicone toys can gum up the surface. A good rule of thumb: If a toy smells, it's not 100-percent silicone). "Platinum" silicone or medical-grade quality silicone shouldn't have any issues. If you are unsure what type of toy you've got, do a spot test on a small area. If it's lower quality, it will immediately gum up.
Common ingredients: Cyclomethicone, dimethiconaol, silicone, dimeticone copolyol, all silicone liquids that combine together to create inert silicone lube.
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Marketing Tips: By Ted Drabkowski
Continue to meet people to build a network. Keep track of who you meet.
Have a plan and use it as a living, working document to guide activity.
Marketing is everything you do or say that your prospects and customers see and hear from you.
If you want to succeed, you will need to think about marketing all the time.
What will I do differently to make my marketing effective?
Start a marketing journal. Write down and keep track of your marketing journey. Write down your commitment to marketing. Example: I know I get busy, but I need to raise my expectations about working on the marketing component of my business. I will read, write, send, call or say something related to marketing every day.
Write down your annual goals, or buy "Goal Pro" software.
Goals should be specific, focused and measurable with time and dates included.
Work on your goals every day. If you are not including others in your goals, chances are that you are part of someone else's goals.
Know your competition and visit their web sites. List the top 3 competitors. List the top 3 benefits of the competition. List your top 3 benefits. Compare the competitor's benefits with yours. Write down every reason you can think of to do business with our company. Now do the same for our competitors. Scratch off the common ones. Are the remaining reasons good enough to be your competitive advantage? Do you need more?
Capitalize on your strengths and your competitors weaknesses.
Know your target market. Narrow your scope. Look at the habits, desires, activities and geography of your potential customers.
We are a niche business. The 5 niche rules are Expertise, Exclusivity, Efficiency, Customer Satisfaction, and Loyalty.
Start a marketing plan. Use the following: The purpose of the plan. Your target market. Your niche. Your benefits or competitive advantage. Your identity. Your weapons. Your budget.
Customers or prospect don't care about you. They care about themselves, and anything they have to read or listen to that is not related to them is of little or no interest. Period. Think of the "What's in it for me" tactic. Sell yourself and the company as a benefit to the customer or prospect. Benefits sell. Convenience, time savings, easy access, fast delivery, reliability, confidentiality, price, discrete shipping, huge product assortment, financial rewards, exciting lifestyle, etc.
Create an identity, image or brand. Use these to create an emotional bond to the company. Are you known as the person/company to go to for any adult product or gift? Communicate your message everywhere and establish your brand. Most customers are loyal, not just one-time buyers. A strong brand helps sell value. Many times a strong brand takes the price out of the purchasing decision.
Communicate your message through letters, faxes, web sites, business cards, brochures, post cards, newsletters, presentations, e-mails, envelopes, letterheads, newspaper ads, magazines, direct mail, classified ads, vehicles signs, networking, etc.
List some networking goals. Example: Meet 10 new people today and get their business card. Hand out 20 business cards. The goal of networking is to make contacts and get information that leads to relationships that leads to business. The key to lead success is follow-up.
Form strategic alliances with other business. There are several ways you can partner with other businesses. One is for them to be a customer. Contact businesses where potential customers shop. Wedding related companies such as caterers, limo companies, bachelorette party companies, bakeries, florists, printing companies, etc. Go through the yellow pages and make a list of categories and call or visit each listing. Buy the owner a gift certificate or give them a free gift if they give you their customer list. These companies make great prospects for recruiting. Refer people to them if they place your cards on the counter. Tell the referrals to mention your name when shopping at their business. Consider co-op advertising with these companies. List your web site on their coupons, split the cost. Link to their web site. Check your direct mail or "junk mail" for companies to affiliate with.
Consider direct mail campaigns. Over 65% of what is mailed is direct mail marketing. Direct mail is one of the most efficient and cost-effective ways to get a message to a target audience. D/M is one of the easier marketing methods to measure. D/M requires frequency. Consider proper timing, budget. Use D/M to promote your web site. Key components are message, vehicle, target, and frequency. Figure what you want prospects to do when they receive your mailing. Buy a product, request more info, request personal contract, enter a contest, visit your web sire, work for you, all of the above.
Create a marketing hook. Free brochure, free gift, host a party.
Consider a press release for your local newspaper. 70% of what is published in news papers is the result of a press release. Tell them you are hosting an event to recruit new prospects. List your contact information.
Start a yearly marketing calendar. Evaluate what works and what does not. Market at regular intervals. Plan for growth. Work the plan. Use your calendar daily.
Use your e-mail as a marketing tool. Add a signature line to the end of each e-mail you send which includes your name, contact information and web site.
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Compiled by Jennifer Martsolf of Wet International and Beau Harris
1. Assess Customers' Needs: Customers may be looking for lubrication for condoms, toys, foreplay, vaginal dryness, masturbation, or anal sex. There are different lubricants to enhance each of those intimate encounters so assist by asking.
2. Be "Ingredient-Savvy": Different formulas have the potential to cause different, sometimes undesired, reactions, so it is best to know what to recommend to whom. Water-based lubes generally are the perfect universal choice because they wash off easily and can be reinvigorated with a quick re-application of water. For those prone to yeast infections or other vaginal irritations, offer a lubricant that is sugar-free. Silicone formulas offer the longest lasting, non-sticky lubrication. They do not breakdown in water so they can be used in the bath, hot tub, or spa. They are very slippery so use caution. Be sure your customer understands that silicone body glides will break down silicone toys. Some people have allergies to methyl or propyl paraben, so if you tend to have bad reactions to lube, these are ingredients to avoid. Also avoid lubes with the spermicidal lubricant Nonoxynol-9. It's a detergent thought to help kill viruses, but it's really a skin irritant that can make transmission more likely if it causes a bad reaction. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has published reports stating that Nonoxynol-9 can damage the cell linings of the rectum, making transmission of STDs easier. It later broadened its recommendation to state: "In the future, purchase of condoms lubricated with N-9 is not recommended because of their increased cost, shorter shelf life, association with urinary tract infections in young women, and lack of apparent benefit compared with other lubricated condoms."
3. Add Some Flava: Flavored lubricants are a great way to enhance foreplay and oral sex. They may be used for intercourse as well, so the customer doesn't need to interrupt playtime to add another lubricant.
4. Know the Basics of Use: Show your customers the proper way to use lube to avoid a too-wet-and-wild time. Instructions, although often printed, are better, ahem, absorbed verbally. First, tell them to start with a dime-size dollop of lube and work their way up from there. Then, use a drop or two of lube on the inside of condom to intensify sensation and movement (helps keep condom from breaking, too). Use hands to warm lube up to keep from chilling his/her partner. Silicone lube can double as massage oil, and because it won't dissolve easily in water, is the best choice for play in the hot tub or shower.
5. Listen to the Body: Lubes with numbing agents often should be avoided. If your customer says he/she is experiencing pain that they are tempted to numb, it's because their body is trying to tell them it isn't ready for whatever sexual activity they are involved in. Recommend that they slow down, use more lube, be patient, and work their way up to new types of play. If a customer complains of allergic reactions (swelling, abundant yeast infections, or pain during sex) and uses either condoms or latex-based toys, they may be allergic to a toy, not their lube. Studies are having a hard time getting good numbers, but as many as 10 percent of the population may be allergic to latex. Try recommending a silicone toy instead and see if it helps them.
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